Your Guide To The College Football Bowl Season, Part II

The 2009 bowl season is upon us, and it’s time to be confronted with a fact you’ve worked all year to cover up: you don’t know as much as you should about college football.

You know Texas and Alabama, sure, but smaller teams like  Ohio, Middle Tennessee, and Fresno State are beyond you. You live your life in fear that you’ll be caught in an in-depth football conversation and exposed when you let slip that you’ve always thought that TCU is the name of the organization Jack Bauer worked for on 24.

Don’t worry, we’re here to help.

The following is a guide to understanding the teams and matchups in the bowl games to come over the next few weeks, starting with the smaller, more obscure bowls. If nothing else, it will give you a few sound bites to make it sound like you know what you’re talking about.

If you missed it, check out Part I.

Music City Bowl, Kentucky vs. Clemson (Dec. 27)

It’s tempting to simplify this to SEC vs. ACC, but remember, Clemson was nearly in the Orange Bowl this year. Both teams had nearly identical records, and both have an impressive list of schools they lost to (Alabama, Florida, TCU, and Georgia Tech). Clemson’s fear of the big stage probably doesn’t play a factor here because, well, it’s Nashville.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Both teams lost to South Carolina this year, but only one played them close. Go ‘Cats!”

Sound like an idiot: “I expect John Wall to be the difference maker here. Go ‘Cats!”

The pick: Clemson 30, Kentucky 17

Independence Bowl, Texas A&M vs. Georgia (Dec. 28)

If defense really isn’t your thing, then this is the game to watch. Both the Aggies and the Bulldogs can roll up the points, and to make things better, both have paper-thin defenses. Ultimately, this game probably comes down to who has the ball last, but it ought to be an entertaining ride.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “A&M nearly knocked off Texas. Georgia shouldn’t be nearly as tough.”

Sound like an idiot: “Total mismatch for Georgia. SEC supremacy!”

The pick: Georgia 45, Texas A&M 42

Eaglebank Bowl, UCLA vs. Temple (Dec. 29)

Temple is playing in a bowl game for just the second time ever, so you know they’re a little excited. UCLA wasn’t great this year, but they’ve been tested in the brutal Pac-10. Temple ought to make a game out of it, but expect them to fall short in the end.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Nine straight wins is nine straight wins, even if they’re in the MAC. Temple is a legit team.”

Sound like an idiot: “A bruin could eat an owl.”

The pick: UCLA 20, Temple 6

Champs Sports Bowl, Miami (FL) vs. Wisconsin (Dec. 29)

Miami is a program on the rise, but their biggest wins this season (besides Georgia Tech) came over dramatically overrated Oklahoma and Florida State teams. Wisconsin is also on the rise, but their best win was an overtime nail-biter over Fresno State. The bottom line? I’ll take the team with one quality win over the team with none, thanks.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Playing in Orlando in December is nice, but next year the ‘Canes will be playing in Miami in January. You know, the Orange Bowl.”

Sound like an idiot: “Big Ten teams have historically done well against Florida teams in bowl games. Right?”

The pick: Miami 31, Wisconsin 17

Humanitarian Bowl, Bowling Green vs. Idaho (Dec. 30)

Both teams posted a 7-5 record in 2009, but Bowling Green rang up six wins against the MAC, while Idaho only went 4-4 in WAC play. I don’t know what that tells us, since both conferences are atrocious, so I’ll take Idaho, a team amped to be playing in a bowl for the first time since the Stone Age and in front of a home crowd to boot.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Even when they lose, the Vandals can still light up the scoreboard. Good luck, Bowling Green.”

Sound like an idiot: “Don’t forget, Bowling Green beat Sun Belt champion Troy this year. So there’s something.”

The pick: Idaho 45, Bowling Green 20

Holiday Bowl, Arizona vs. Nebraska (Dec. 30)

If a couple of plays had broken differently (against Oregon and Texas), this could easily have been a BCS game. The matchup is the classic case of the irresistible force versus the immovable object. The Huskers’ defense, anchored by Ndamukong Suh, allows just over 11 points per game. The Wildcats’ offense scores just under 30 a game. Something has to give.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Ndamukong Suh would have won the Heisman this year if it weren’t so biased toward offensive players.”

Sound like an idiot: “Ndomokung…Ndamikeng, Ndamu…Donkey Kong?”

The pick: Nebraska 13, Arizona 12

Armed Forces Bowl, Houston vs. Air Force (Dec. 31)

These two teams ought to be pretty familiar with each other by now – it’s the third time they’ve faced each other in the last two years. Houston’s offense, led by QB Case Keenum, knows how to score, having hung 73 on Rice, but Air Force is no slouch either, having dropped 72 on Nicholls State. Here’s hoping the scoreboard operators brought some extra light bulbs.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Air Force has consistently exceeded expectations in the Mountain West for the last few years.”

Sound like an idiot: “You just know those crooked Armed Forces Bowl refs are going to favor Air Force.”

The pick: Houston 55, Air Force 31

Sun Bowl, Oklahoma vs. Stanford (Dec. 31)

The Sun Bowl features two teams headed in dramatically different directions. Two years ago, Stanford was a bottom-feeder in the Pac-10 until their dramatic upset over USC as a 42-point underdog. Oklahoma was a national juggernaut until Sam Bradford suffered a season-ending injury against BYU in an upset loss. The Sooners’ defense is still stout, but Toby Gerhart will probably prove too much for them.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Stanford has the chops to challenge for the Pac-10 crown next year.”

Sound like an idiot: “Oklahoma might not be the Big 12 champion, but at least they won their divi… no… well, at least they won their state championship!”

The pick: Stanford 21, Oklahoma 17

Texas Bowl, Navy vs. Missouri (Dec. 31)

Both teams posted 8-4 records this year, but it might surprise you to hear that Navy actually had the tougher schedule. The fact that Navy’s win over Notre Dame was better than any of Missouri’s wins tells you all you need to know. Wins over Iowa State, Illinois, and Furman don’t exactly fill me with confidence.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Everyone talks about Georgia Tech’s triple option, but Navy’s been running that scheme for years.”

Sound like an idiot: “If you cheer for Missouri, the terrorists win. Support our troops!”

The pick: Navy 27, Missouri 20

Insight Bowl, Minnesota vs. Iowa State (Dec. 31)

Both teams are 6-6. Both teams went 3-5 in conference play. Both teams laid a huge egg against ranked opponents. Your guess is as good as mine. When in doubt, go with the team that’s excited to be there, which is Iowa State, headed to a bowl game for the first time since 2005.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “The Cyclones may just be 6-6 this year, but they’re a program on the rise in the Big 12.”

Sound like an idiot: “Minnesota and Iowa State? Shouldn’t this be a hockey game?”

The pick: Iowa State 21, Minnesota 20

Chick-Fil-A Bowl, Virginia Tech vs. Tennessee (Dec. 31)

These two teams combined have four losses to teams appearing in BCS games (Florida, Alabama x2, and Georgia Tech). However, Virginia Tech only has one other loss, while Tennessee also lost to Ole Miss and UCLA. The Vols are headed in the right direction under new head coach Lane Kiffin, but they still have a little way to go before they can hang with the Hokies.

Sound like you know what you’re talking about: “Tennessee QB Johnathan Crompton is worlds better than he was last year.”

Sound like an idiot: “They’ll be singing ‘Rocky Top’ all night long after beating Florida. Er, I mean, Virginia Tech.”

The pick: Virginia Tech 34, Tennessee 10.

Part III to come.