Allen Iverson and Zach Randolph are Waging Civil War in Memphis

The Memphis Grizzlies are putting two different teams on the floor this season.

One is the young, vibrant, up-and-coming nucleus of O.J. Mayo and Rudy Gay.

The other team is the aging, controversial, ball-monopolizing duo of Allen Iverson and Zach Randolph.

For the first time in the post-Pau Gasol era the Grizzlies are worth watching, but not because they’re going to win any actual games. By season’s end, one half of their own self will have beaten the other. It’s a house divided ideologically against itself, and only one team will be left standing.

The Mayo/Gay duo have already taken the lead in that matchup, as Iverson is already unhappy with his back-up role.

Call it 1-0, Young Guns.

I’ve made my feelings about Allen Iverson’s future clear before in Allen Iverson and the Virtue of Selfishness, which remains the most popular article ever published on this site. I’d rather AI go home and disappear so we can remember him in his prime—the same thing I said when Joe Montana went to the Kansas City Chiefs, when Michael Jordan went to the Washington Wizards, and even when Brett Favre went to the New York Jets.

Is it really a surprise to anyone that Iverson’s not happy?

Clearly someone is responsible for pulling the wool over AI’s eyes about the situation in Memphis. From an outsider’s perspective, it was clear he’d be redundant in the backcourt of a struggling, perennially-underachieving team. A team best known for employing the other Gasol brother. It’s a squad that won 24 games last year, and that was their best season in three years.

Makes his rocky situation in Detroit look pretty good. At least they made the playoffs.

It’s easy to overlook that so far, at least on the hardwood, Allen Iverson has been a model 6th man. The sample size is much too small to make an accurate reading right now, but the team’s +/- has been best with Iverson on the floor alongside the other four starters. He’s been efficient, too: AI leads the team in field goal percentage at almost 58%, and in his limited minutes he’s scoring more points per 48 minutes than anyone else on the team.

Iverson’s recent misgivings likely have little to do with Memphis, and rather have everything to do with himself: his spent youth, his exhausted chances, his missed shot at a title without another in sight. His unwillingness to adapt his game to his age and surroundings are almost certainly tied to his failure to achieve what he set out to do when joining the league.

It’s shades of Uncle Rico, from Napoleon Dynamite. While he could be making a largely positive impact in his most experienced years, he’s instead betting he can throw a football over the mountains and that his team would’ve won state, if only the coach had played him in the fourth quarter.

Mayo and Gay win by default if Iverson retires. But in the meantime, they have to deal with some monster statistical output from Zach Randolph.

Which gives the Ball Hogs a point and ties it 1-1.

Z-Bo has been a reliable double-double machine, with numbers that are second on the team in scoring (behind Gay) at 19 points per game and second also in rebounds (behind Gasol) at 11 per game.

The production is hard to argue with. While we openly mocked the Grizz for being the only team dumb enough to pick up Randolph’s contract from the Clippers, his numbers aren’t lying. His efficiency is spectacular, too, with a PER that ranks 28^th in the league and ahead of guys like Tony Parker, Brandon Roy, and Chauncey Billups.

But at the same time, Gay and Mayo have each stepped up their game.

2-1, Young Guns.

Rudy Gay is posting 21 points and 7 boards a game. O.J. Mayo is racking 18 and 5. With Gay in only his fourth season and Mayo in his second, these guys have long, prosperous NBA futures ahead of them.

And if Memphis can keep them, then the Grizzlies are eventually going to be clawing their way back into the playoffs.

But for now, they’re losing touches and shots to a couple of ball-absorbing veterans.

Point, Ball Hogs. 2-2.

I think it’s fair to leave the score tied at this point. The chance that both of these dynamic duos can co-exist all season is nearly negated by their diametrically opposed ideologies; their mere existence on the same court is contradictory. The Grizzlies brought in scorers in the offseason, but perhaps at the cost of nurturing their two budding stars.

My hunch is that when April rolls around, one duo will have climbed to the top by using the other as its stepstool.

If all is right in the world, then Gay and Mayo will have breakout seasons and reduce the need for Iverson and Randolph. AI will get upset and retire; Z-Bo will start punching people and getting into legal trouble.

The alternative is much darker. If Iverson and/or Randolph can poison the Young Guns with negative attitudes, all while monopolizing ball touches on the floor, then evil holds victory over good. Gay and Mayo’s individual numbers go down, and they are relegated to role playing when they should be leading the team.

Which will it be? Watch the box scores. It’ll be clear.

The best team will win.